Dark Moments

The path of healing my body from chronic illness has been everything but easy. I have gone through many different stages since I decided to go off medicines and follow a natural healing approach.

The first year was especially difficult because I didn’t know where to start and what information to believe. My body was not always reacting as expected despite my efforts to improve my health.

I became obsessed with controlling what I was eating and how I was exercising. I used to spend most of my free time and weekends surfing on the internet in the quest for different types of diets and supplements that could help me to improve my symptoms.

Talking to family and friends about my new lifestyle became frustrating because nobody seemed to understand what I was doing. Some of my friends even suggested that I was being irresponsible for going off medicine without my doctor’s approval and supervision.

For some time I was able to control my diet but doing so often made me stressed and unhappy. Even more so, I was lost and overwhelmed with all the information that I was getting from books and the internet. Two years on, I understand that I had to live all those things to mature and to learn how to let go of the past and move forward.

Dark moments still come back from time to time, especially if I am feeling tired due to the adjustments of my metabolism or when, on occasion, my body reacts badly to certain types of food or cold weather.

These moments are the darkest when they lead to a period of depression as it’s when I lose interest in the things that would normally make me happy. But luckily these dark moments are not frequent anymore, only coming up on rare occasions and only lasting for a little while.

I do not hold back with them anymore. I live them. I feel them. I try to learn from them without making any judgement. And then I let them go. I do not try to control my life anymore, just focus on enjoying the journey to health, accepting dark moments as one of life’s lessons.

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